The Dawn Fog

The spark once surged in my mind
Racing from this to that
Relentless, rapid
Ravenous and curious
Seeking nothing but truth
The spark departed
And fog moved in
To cloud my judgment
To silence my voice
I try to ignite it myself
But I seem to have no choice
Manufactured thoughts
Rehearsed speech
Who am I?
I can’t be me.
Am I living a lie?
Or fighting the flesh?
Is this the good fight?
Or a hot mess?
The worst is a sentence
That starts from the heart
The next words never come
Nothing makes sense
I try to improvise
And react in self defense
But I know that I’m impaired
I’m scared.
Should I open my mouth?
Does anyone care?